My Best Mistake: Believing someone else would make things happen

I could write a book with the mistakes I’ve made

This post is inspired by a LinkedIn series in which 60 leaders of business where asked to tell a story of “My Best Mistake“. Those cringe-worthy moments that changed their careers.

I read through some and decided I needed to figure out which was my cringe-worthy moment, my best mistake.

There were a lot to pick from, as I believe there were a lot of mistakes made over the years. I try to not worry too much about them since I believe that they are the foundation to learning and getting better.

It took a while, but I narrowed down the pivotal moment in my career thus far.

My Best Mistake:

I was working full time at a company where I was brought in as the first SQL Server DBA. Well, the first DBA ever at the company. I worked closely with the manager of the department to not only learn the company data and systems, but to also learn the working of the business itself. The manager agreed to become a mentor for me as I worked towards becoming a manager of IT.

We were working on a very difficult migration from an old DOS based database system to a newly custom developer SQL Server database. All with no documentation. I hunkered down and started learning both the old and the new system and started creating a complete data migration process. Over the course of 4 years I learned the workings of the company pretty well, and had a real grasp on the old and new database working and functionality. During this time the manager worked with me to help hone skills such as ‘seeing the forest for the trees’ and detailed work quality checks prior to anything going to our internal customers. We talked about the team, how things were going, and where things were heading. It all seemed good. There were lots of moments of extreme pressure from the upper management, execs and parent company to finish this project and things progressively got worst and worst. I stuck through it all though. I wanted to see the project succeed, and I had a goal int he company to move up if the opportunity presented itself.

There were many days of confrontation about why I did something a certain way, why did I not consult with the manager who was not available when needed. I knew I was a key player int he project and making it work, but was not told that in terms that were the best to use. Stating to someone: ‘You are a single point of failure for this project’ does not have the same effect as ‘we would not be able to do this without you’. After a while I was sequestered to my cube. I was even relocated in front of the manager so s/he would know if anyone was coming to ‘chat’ with me and distract me from the work at hand. It wasn’t that I was not getting stuff done, just the opposite, I was dealing with people to get the answers needed to move the project forward.

I remember many a time other team members, and employees in different groups, asking why I put up with it all. “I would have quit by now’ they all said. I would just look at them and say “I am here to do this job, and I’m going to do it right and see it succeed.” I knew I had a mentor in management and someone that was pulling for me based on the work I did. Finally in my career there was a chance for things to go where I wanted them to, and someone was actually helping, not hindering that opportunity.

Then the day came. The manager gave their 2 weeks notice before a critical deadline for the project. I kept working in my sequestered little world, trying to get as much done and solidified before the manager’s departure. I had been working for years to learn that position and was getting ready in my head to possibly take over the project and department. All the hard work would finally pay off.

The 2 weeks went by, and nothing. In fact, I wasn’t even spoken to at all for the 2 weeks of transition to a fellow developer on the project. In fact I didn’t get a goodbye from my mentor until the last moments of the final day of them being part of the company. I still feel those were ‘forced’ as I happened to be in certain places (by chance) as the manager popped in ‘making the rounds to say Goodbye ‘.

Needless to say I was crushed. My self confidence was shot, I was exhausted on the verge of burning out. I did everything I could to make the manager and the project be a success and got nothing for it. Not even a real ‘Goodbye’ from my mentor for years.

I could use one of these

Sure, the project was a relative flop when done as a lot of stuff was glazed over or skipped in the interest of hitting deadlines rather than having it all work properly (I still hear stories of the system from friends), But it still was a pivotal moment for me.

I started looking for a new opportunity immediately and as soon as one came I was gone. I had had enough. I was not going to let others control my future anymore. I was going to step up and start doing things in my career for me.

I went on to work at Amtrak for 6 months as the only in house SQL DBA, then moved on to head up a 10 person Sr. SQL DBA team on a large government project. The team I lead was one of the only ones on the entire project that was consistently on time and on task with anything thrown our way. During that project is when I went out on my own as an independent SQL Server Consultant. I also decided that I would get active on twitter, and start attending various conferences and events associated with SQL Server around the country. From that I stepped up to organize the SQL Saturday for Washington DC for 2012 & 2013 and have started an official PASS chapter (PASSDC) in the DC area.

I also started Waterox Consulting, and I have not looked back. Sure there are lots of mistakes that have been made, and that are still being made. The one mistake though that changed everything, was believing that someone else could make things happen for me. It is a mistake I will not make again.

SQL Cruise – Day 4 & 5 – In port @ St. Maarten / St. Martin & St. Thomas

Day of Excursions!

Today SQL Cruise docked in St. Maarten / St Martin. Sicne this was an excursion day there was no requirement to get together with everyone for anything formal. We were set loose to the wilds of the islands.

We took the chance to sleep in a little, then headed on shore with no formal plans. We were on vacation now, and that means no planning right? The only thing we planned was to take photos with the Confio performance hog that I received int he SQL Cruise swag bag.

I loaded up the swag bag with what we needed running around the island and we headed down and out into the sun.

St. Maarten / St. Martin

Went and walked around town, then grabbed a taxi and headed on a tour of the island. Wound up at very crowded beach with a fun restaurant on the french side of the island. Slow service but it was on island time/speed. Got some great photos with the confio Performance Hog and had a fun time. Finished tour and headed back to the ship. Soaked in one of the Haven’s hot tubs and then had a nice dinner and watched the moon rise.

Ended the day exhausted and got some good sleep in prep for the next day in St. Thomas.

The beach at Secret Harbour when 6 cruise ships were in port. Yay for no crowd!

St. Thomas

Another early day and no SQL training scheduled. We gradually worked our way off the ship and found a private taxi to take us to a ‘non croded beach’ near impossible, but our taxi driver nail ed it. Only cadillac on the island. First beach, nothing at, couldn’t see without paying entry fee. Went to secret harbor and got to use 1/2 the resort’s beach and rent equipment at the dive shop (link). Active reef and we saw hundreds of types of fish dn even squid. Highly recommend this to anyone going on SQL Cruise, or going to be in the area. We finished up sitting at the Cruzan Beach Club bar when our driver walked up and we headed back to the ship. We did a little shopping, picked up some very good bourbon and vodka and worked our way back on board to have a nice dinner and relaxing night.

A Day of Fosterly

Join us at A Day of Fosterly next month! We will be in the startup showcase and will be more than happy to discuss how we may be able to help your company with its SQL Server needs.

Last month I was looking for some new ways to get out into the local community and find companies needing help with their SQL Server systems. In my search for resources and contacts I stumbled across an organization name Fosterly.

Fosterly is a community of entrepreneurs. These entrepreneurs, who span the professional spectrum from business to photography to web-development and more, have a desire to efficiently locate relevant information and connect with others in their community. Fosterly streamlines and facilitates this process. One of the many ways they accomplish this is through hosting ‘A Day of Fosterly‘ in Arlington, VA.

Not your average conference, the Day of Fosterly is more than eight hours of collaborative entrepreneurship for anyone interested in starting, growing, or exiting a business. With a focus on spotlighting many of the best endeavors in the region, attendees will depart with hands on experience, knowledge and relationships.

I have not had a chance to be involved with this event in the past, but applied and was accepted to be in the startup showcase which allows investors and others to learn more about your company in a great social environment.

I am hoping that it will help to build a list of clients that ultimately bring us on board for consulting and concierge care. If that doesn’t happen, I will at least get a lot of great information and contacts for a lot of great start up businesses in the area.

Announcing PASSDC!

It’s been with great anticipation that I’m happy to announce PASSDC, the official PASS chapter for Washington, DC. PASSDC is founded by three community members: Me,  Paul Rizza of Microsoft, and Matt Velic. Together we’re aiming to bring greater SQL Server community and support to the DC Metro area.

But wait a minute! There are already two user groups in The DC area already! This is true. But the clue above is in that we’re focused on the DC Metro area. After SQL Saturday last year and discussions with PASS I was asked to help head up a chapter in the District proper.  I reached out to Paul Rizza of Microsoft, and Matt Velic to see if they were interested in helping out, and they agreed! We teamed up with CPCUG to get non-profit status and we are focusing on helping professionals & other users of SQL Server who live in the District and directly surrounding suburbs. People who might not have easy access to a car and rely on Metro for their transportation needs as well. While the NOVA and Columbia groups have been serving Northern Virginia and Baltimore very well (respectively), they aren’t always that convenient for folks living in DC proper or more East towards Annapolis.

Matt, Paul & I are striving to be able to provide better learning opportunities and content for SQL users in our nation’s capitol.

Our First Meeting

PASSDC’s first meeting is coming up next Thursday, April 11th! That’s right: we’re heading in full bore and not wasting time. This first meeting will feature Paul as our speaker, and he’s planned a session on building SSIS packages using an open source API library. We are also going to take some time to discuss some of the ideas and dreams we have for our group and how it can help the local community. Primarily we want to hear from you about how the group can better support the DC SQL community.

As a bonus for our meeting we will be providing dinner and even managed to wrangle up some swag to give at the conclusion of our first meeting! Even though it is kind of short notice, we hope you will come visit us and help launch this new group!

About PASSDC

View Larger Map Event Map

General information about the group:

• First Meeting: April 11th at 6:30pm!
• Regular Schedule: Second Thursday of each month at 6:30pm
• Location: Microsoft Technology Center
  5404 Wisconsin Ave, Suite 700
  Chevy Chase, MD 20815
• Travel Options:
  • Metro: Friendship Heights station on the Red Line. Microsoft is directly above the station, next to Whole Foods.
  • Driving:  Parking is available at the Mazza Gallery garage, or directly below the building in the Whole Foods parking garage.
• Assorted Contact Info:
  • Website: http://passdc.sqlpass.org
  • Email: sqlpassdc@gmail.com
  • Facebook: Like our Page
  • Twitter: Tune in for Updates
  • LinkedIn: Join our group

I hope you’re as excited as we are about the group: it definitely been a long time coming for the DC Metro area.

Again, we hope that you’ll be able to make it out next Thursday, make some introductions, and help us grow the community.

See you there!

SQL Cruise Day 3 – Great sessions and Itialian food

The time change this morning kicked me hard. I went to bed too late last night to start with, and sailing through timezones and  losing an hour did not help much.
I did finally get a chance though to sit and have breakfast in the Haven’s private restaurant. It was nice to watch the waves role by and have a more gentle start to the day.

Rare photo of Sean McCown actually writing

We started with an “office hours” session discussing Availability groups in detail  and some great info came from that. It made me want to go home and setup a few availability groups on my home test environment just to get more familiar with it. The setup of an office hours to accommodate the hour change in the morning was a brilliant idea by Tim (blog | twitter) . Even though this office hours was not the normal type, I still feel that it is one of the best things about SQL Cruise.

Once everyone arrived we concluded Sean McCown’s (blog | twitter) session on being an enterprise DBA. The knowledge provided was invaluable and as far as I’m concerned made the cruise completely worth

while and worth the cost. I even had the thoughts that SQL Cruise could be done now and I will have gotten more information and assistance than I had been able to get through the last few months of study. But, I am glad the cruise continued and with even more great info being shared!

After Sean finished up we took a quick bio break and then had Ryan Adams (blog | twitter)  present Active Directory and SQL Server. This was a great look into how the active directory works with SQL and gave some fantastic info about Kerberos that I was not aware of. It is pretty cool and I am going to read up some more on it when I get home.

We finished up the SQL day with a class outside with Tim (blog | twitter) leading an open discussion on metadata, based on questions provided by SQL Cruisers on cue cards he had handed out earlier in the week. I couldn’t think of any questions to ask at the time, but the ones asked and the answers provided by the collective of the instructors and students were great and helpful for future things. Tim’s session conveniently blended into the cocktail hour tonight which included yet another group shot on the back deck in Spice H2O. The folks in the hot tub behind the photo got a little rowdy, but we warned them not to get into a competition with a bunch of DBAs who get to have a few drinks for free. The classic don’t get into a fight you can’t finish, or even compete with.

The evening capped off with my family and me going to ‘la Cucina’ Italian restaurant. We got to watch the moon rise over the ocean and had some great Italian food. Well worth the additional price of admission ($15 I think). The meal was on par with something that would have easily cost >$50 / person at home. This is one of the many reasons we love cruising. Once we finished dessert we headed back to the room to rest and prepare for 2 days of no SQL sessions. We were going to be in port tomorrow at Jamestown and we had no real plans. We will probably wander into town, and maybe down to the beach for a while. Either way it will be nice to get off the ship for a while, and to get some down time to help reset my brain for the rest of the SQL training coming back in a couple of days.